How To Get Out of A Rut? Change The Definition.


The dreaded rut. We all face it at some point (and several friends have shared they've been feeling it lately.) You too? Then read on.

Yes, it's depressing, yes, it causes anxiety, yes, it's demoralizing.  Yes, it downright SUCKS.  It is all of those painful, uncomfortable things. But what if it's also something else, something positive you may not have considered before?

Your "rut" is actually your guide - tweet this!

At its core, a rut is simply dissatisfaction with things as they are.  Your dissatisfaction is trying to tell you something. It's the fork in the road - a sign to change direction.

First things first. What got you here in the first place?  


  1. You're avoiding something (or, pretending not to know - mmhmm)

  2. You don't know what you want

If you're avoiding something...

In all likelihood, this isn't the first time this issue has come up. It's just that suddenly (or gradually) the pebble in your shoe has become too painful to ignore. Face it and do what you (already) know you must. It won't go away otherwise. Worse still, the pebble will become a boulder - that lands directly on you. Ouch!

If you don't know what you want...

It May Take Time. In this world of instant gratification it's easy to seek a quick fix but as ruts go you may not immediately feel better.  Give yourself breathing room because self-beat only exacerbates and extends a rut.  


1.  Feed your mind with inspiration - even if you're feeling uninspired. Energy is a powerful thing and as you begin to seek inspiration (inspirational websites, books, Ted Talks, events, music) the EXACT message you need to hear will find you.

2. Surrender. I don't mean give up, I mean give in to the present moment... the place where you don't know what to do and don't have an answer.  Frustration, anger, and avoidance are all forms of resistance - a rope that gets tighter and tighter the more you struggle. Stop struggling and just BE. The answer will come and this too shall pass (especially if you're actively practicing the above.)

3. Set a date.  This one may seem counterintuitive, especially if you haven't found your answers yet, but stay with me.  Declarations are as powerful as dynamite and they can be the spark your psyche needs to shift gears. A date is a goal post - something to aim for. Set one and I guarantee that 1. You'll instantly feel accomplished and 2. watch how quickly you and random occurrences in your life begin to line up.  I dare you!

If you use your rut as a guide and a tool to change it up, you'll create the opportunity to level up.

Think of this as time in the lab - you're cooking up something new.  You've got this!  

I love your feedback, suggestions, and thoughts! Comment below and share them with me. 

Until next time, keep living #thatconsciouslife

5 Ways To Figure Out What You Want


It is absolutely possible to get somewhere if you don't know where you want to go - but I imagine you may look up and wonder how the hell you got there. It's much more effective to decide where exactly you'd like to go.  

The Universe is listening.  

Your angels and guides are waiting to support you.  In The Universe Has Your Back Gabby Bernstein talks about the universe operating as a Spiritual GPS.  I love that.  We relinquish our desires and we are guided - given hints, signs, and opportunities and sometimes we're redirected.  We are given direction. But, like any GPS - our guides need a destination. Your desire and intention is the address.  

So how do you figure out what you want?

5 practices to get to the heart of what you truly want:

  1. Pray or meditate or both. They both have the similar effects.   

  2. Ask questions of yourself and of others... Ask yourself: what do I enjoy?  When was I most enjoy (read: In-Joy)? Ask your loved ones: What do you see as my strengths and my weaknesses? Where have you noticed me in the zone, in my bliss? Where do I bring you the most joy.

  3. Daydream...give yourself permission to fantasize and imagine a life that brings you an incredible amount of joy. You'll be surprised what you discover when you allow your mind the freedom to roam unbound by "reality".

  4. Journal...set the mood.  Light your favorite candles, pull out objects that hold special meaning to you (mementos, crystals, etc.) and gather them around. Then put pen to paper and let whatever comes flow through.  I highly recommend boosting the energy of this practice by using astrology as a heavenly amplifier and doing this activity during a new moon or a full moon. Full moons are a wonderful time to reflect on and let go of whatever behaviors, beliefs or challenges aren't serving your highest good. New moons represent new beginnings and are an opportune time to set powerful intentions. 

  5. Give it time.  The inclination is for us to get hung up on time.  Either it's running out or it isn't moving fast enough.  The invitation is to view time as a construct you control. The closer you watch the pot, the "slower" it boils.  Do whatever it takes to shift your perspective.  Actively say to yourself - out loud if you're really in the thick of it - "I have all the time I need" or "I am exactly where I get to be right now."  Or, call a homegirl - there's nothing like a true friend to snap you out of the emotional hamster wheel.  Know that you are exactly where you need to be on your journey in the present moment.  Be there. Breathe there.  Allow yourself the space and time this phase of discovery requires. The most beautiful roses take all the time they need to blossom. 

The one thing NOT to do:

  1. Judge yourself.  Our learned behaviors - picked up from our parents, culture, community, societal norms, and expectations can drown out that inner voice of wisdom and love that whispers your truth to you. Don't shush it. You're hearing the call for a reason and your heart knows what's true. Validate your needs and desires without guilt or shame.


10 Tools To Boost Your Self Worth

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When you know your ideas have merit, when you realize your voice and opinions matter, and when you are finally ready to shine - that's when the doubtful thoughts get louder.  Thought like "You're not doing it right", "you're not as good as...", "you’re not ready yet”, “you don't have it together" surface and they can result in you: 

  • Undermining your leadership abilities causing your brand, business, and career growth to suffer.  

  • Missing out on what you've always wanted to pursue.

  • Shrinking from the meaningful contribution you're meant to make.

  • Seeking validation from external sources.

To help you diffuse the feeling of not-enoughness on the spot, I’ve compiled the following 10 tools to build your confidence and worth

They're broken into 4 categories: Videos, Research-Based Hacks, Affirmations, and Books.  Use them to create powerful results in your business and life (minus the exhausting fight against doubt).


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Ted Talks

12 Ted Talks on Boosting Self Esteem

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